Day 2

Hi, all!

It is a gorgeous day here in Wisconsin. The next few days are going to be scorchers but then it will cool off and be in the 50's and 60's, which I am incredibly excited for!

Yesterday I made some goals for myself: 

1. Track everything I put in my body

2. Drink water - not soda

3. Workout for 10 minutes, 3 times/day

4. Walk at least 5000 steps

These were the main goals I had and I am happy to say that I achieved them! I tracked everything I ate, even when I did not want to track. In fact, I stuck to my calorie goal! I did not drink any soda. I walked for 31 minutes and had 6,336 steps. All-in-all, day 1 was a success! There were different times when I faced temptation and I succeeded. Honestly, I am proud of myself! 

Today I am giving myself the same goals. I have already faced and surpassed temptation today. My husband wanted to go and get fast food for breakfast, I was close to caving in and having him get me the normal thing I would have chosen. It would have been 1250 calories and there are half of my calories for the day. Instead, I opted for Subway and got a bacon, egg white, and cheese on whole grain flatbread. It was delicious, healthy, and only 370 calories. I added some yogurt and coffee at home to it and it was a wonderful breakfast. 

The rest our day is going to be busy. My husband and I are going and getting a copy of our marriage license. Then tomorrow we can go change my social security card, go to the DMV, and finally change all of my information at our bank and at my school. And of course, I need to continue to work on thank you cards from our wedding. Since we are going to be pretty busy for the next few days, it takes most of my self-control to stop myself from saying that we should just go out and grab food quickly. Instead, I am making healthier food choices. I made a quick and healthy lunch at home before we are heading out. I need to continue to make healthy choices because it will be far too easy to slide back into my old habits. 

Until next time!

~Sara~

Ups and Downs

Hi, all!

Happy Monday! How are you all doing today? I’m doing okay, last week was incredibly busy and filled with many ups and downs. Honestly, I’m really glad that it’s a new week and I get to start fresh. This week my goal is to not eat out at all and eat at or a little below my calorie goal each day. I really need to get my nutrition under control and begin making healthier choices every day.

I began last week by doing quite well, Sunday and Monday my calories were quite low and Tuesday I was about 100 under my goal. At that point, I was feeling good about myself and how well I was doing, but then that changed on Wednesday. I had a long day of class and I talked to my best friend when I got home and then I was feeling sort of hungry. Instead of grabbing one of the snacks I keep in the house for occasions such as this, I went online and ordered a big pizza and a few other things. I ate a little of it that night but saved the rest of it for the next day. On Thursday, I was feeling really down about what I had done the night before and wanted to just throw the food away but I can’t really afford to do that. So, I came up with a plan to eat the food that I had bought but make it fit into my calorie range. That planned worked until the afternoon because I had an incredibly stressful morning and then I let my stress take over and I pigged out on the pizza. That day, I ate 7 slices of large pizza and then I had a few other things in the evening. I honestly don’t know how many calories I ate that day but it happened. Friday I decided to start fresh and I did well, I was about 160 calories under my goal for the day. Saturday came around and I was having a fantastic day, I was ahead on my to-do list, my dinner was in the slow cooker and I was on track to being at or under my calorie goal for the day. Around 4 PM I was starting to get hungry and again, instead of grabbing a snack I ordered some food. I ate more than I needed to again and felt unsatisfied after. At that point, I saw how easily my nutrition was consumed by my stress and boredom, so now I’m trying to focus more on my nutrition and making healthier choices.

The few days that I ate too much led me to gain weight for the week. Yesterday I weighed myself and I wasn’t happy with what I saw. I gained a pound last week because of a few bad choices. Last week I sabotaged myself, which is hard to admit but it’s the truth. This needs to stop, now. I know that I won’t be perfect with my nutrition all the time and sometimes I’ll make unhealthy food choices and that’s okay. The thing that I’m trying to do right now is have more healthy days than unhealthy. When I do have an unhealthy day, I am going to try and not eat so much. I went and got groceries yesterday and I made sure to grab a few different types of snacks, so that if I am craving a certain thing that I can eat a little of it and not binge on it.

Well, this is where I am signing off. I have class tonight and I have a few things to get done this afternoon before I leave. I hope that you all have an amazing week! Until next time!
~Sara~

2016, New Year, New Me

Hi, all!

Happy Thursday! How are you all? I haven’t written in so long, so I’m not sure if anyone is still listening. My last post was in August, which means it’s been five months. Honestly, though, I haven’t been posting regularly since the end of May/beginning of June. There are a variety of reasons that I haven’t posted in so long, including that grad school has kept me insanely busy and that sometimes things simply were not going well, so I didn’t post. I have definitely had my ups and downs over the past five months, no doubt about it. My winter break just ended and so many times I thought about posting. I had all of these thoughts in my head about what to say, but I never wrote them down. My problem is that I have so much to say and sometimes I don’t know how to articulate those thoughts.

On Monday, I returned to Seattle after spending 3 weeks in Wisconsin with my family for my winter break. It was a wonderful trip, I didn’t realize how much I missed my family until I saw them again, it was definitely bittersweet coming back and having to leave again. After being back with my family for a few weeks, I realize that after I graduate, I may want to return to Wisconsin to work. The time that I have to make this decision is far from now, so I definitely have some time, however, it is something that I will be thinking about a great deal.

Yesterday, I began my second quarter of grad school. It is hard to believe that I’m a quarter closer to being done, only 10 quarters left. I know that my time at SPU will go by quickly and I need to learn as much as I can from my professors and colleagues. It seems like I just started college and here I am with an associate’s degree, bachelor’s degree and working toward my master’s degree, time flies. Honestly, it feels like I just graduated from high school and I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. At the same time, it feels like high school was so long ago, which, depending on your definition of long, it has been. By the end of this school year, I will have been out of high school for 8 years, which is a scary thought. Nevertheless, here I am almost 8 years later, in grad school, with two degrees under my belt already. Life is definitely a journey.    

Now it’s time in this ridiculously long post, to share some of the not so positive things that have happened over the past five months. I wish that I could say that everything in my life is perfect and that I stayed on track with my fitness and nutrition over the past months. Sadly, I need to report the exact opposite. I have not made healthy food choices and I have done a very little exercise. This has caused me to gain back all of the weight that I lost and then some. It is really hard for me to admit this but my weight is up to 321, a new high. I promised myself that I would never see a ‘3’ as the first number of my weight again, but here I am. For a while, I simply stopped caring and let my food cravings take over. I didn’t step on the scale and I avoided looking at my body, besides seeing if my clothing looked okay. Then when I was in Wisconsin, I went to the doctor and I had to step on the scale. I knew that I hadn’t been doing well but I never thought that I would have gained so much weight. When I saw that number on the scale I almost cried because never in my life did I imagine that I would weigh 321 pounds. At the rate I was going, I was just killing myself slowly.

To be honest, I have been really struggling with my food choices. Food has taken over my life again and it is so hard to try and stop. There have been days where I would try to make healthier food choices and I did for part of the day but then toward the end, I was just so hungry. It goes to show how many calories I had been eating, though, it was a very high number. So, I am now trying to plan out meals that are lower in calories and have healthy ingredients. I am hoping that if I eat lower calories foods I’ll be able to eat more of them and that will trick my body into not being so hungry. For Christmas, my mom gave me her old crock pot, so I’m searching for a lot of healthy recipes. I know that doing some meal planning will help me each day and also will help me when I am grocery shopping. I’m hoping that it will help me stop buying all these foods that I don’t need for my meals.

I have written out some weekly, monthly and yearly goals, so that is a step in the right direction. At this point, I’m not going to share my specific goals because some of them are quite personal, but I will share my major goals. I need to simply make healthier food choices, reduce my calories and start working out more again. My most important goal is to break the unhealthy habits that I have created. If I don’t break these habits, my health will deteriorate. My health and life are more important and precious than the foods I desire.

Well, there you have it, I have shared everything that I need to. Life is about to get busy again because my classes have started up again, but I promise that I will start posting on a regular basis. I don’t know how many people read my posts but I hope that my honesty can help at least one person continue on with their journey. If nothing else, sharing what I am going through helps to keep me accountable and that is definitely something that I need. This is a long and hard journey and I need to keep myself going strong along the way. I hope that you all are having an absolutely wonderful beginning to your new year! This New Year is a clean slate for each of us and we can start over. Honestly, I believe that each day is a new beginning and we can become whoever we wish to be, all it takes is a little hard work and perseverance. We can do this! I promise that I’ll post again soon. Until next time!

~Sara~ 

Weigh-In, Recapping Goals and Weekly Goals

Hi, all!

Happy Sunday! How are you all doing on this gorgeous day? The sun is currently shining, however, it did rain this morning. I'm sorry that I haven't been updating much lately, it's been a struggle. This coming week I'm definitely going to try harder all around.

It's Sunday, which means it's time to share my results for this past week. I'll be honest, I had an absolutely horrendous week, both nutritionally and with my fitness. I was lacking the motivation to work out and I made far too many unhealthy food choices. Also, I ate more calories than I wanted or needed. Honestly, I only tracked my food three days and those were the only three days that I made healthier food choices.

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 306.5 lbs

Current Weight: 306.2 lbs

Weight Lost: 8.8 lbs

Amazingly enough, I lost .3 pounds last week. I truly do not know how that happened, but it did, and I won't turn it down. I've been feeling a bit down on myself because of my lack of progress this month. So today I decided to look back at my numbers from April 27th and I'm actually sort of amazed by how much progress I've made since then. In 48 days, I've lost 7.2 pounds. So, in just about 7 weeks, I've lost 7.2 pounds, which equates to .97 pounds each week. Losing almost a pound each week is nothing to be sad about, that's continuous progress. Yes, I have a long way to go still, but I'm making progress either way.

Now on to recapping my goals from last week, let's just say, I did horribly with them. Plain and simple. I didn't lose at least .5 pound, but I did lose .3, and after my week, I'll count that as a win. I did work out four times but only had 138 minutes instead of my goal of 180. I most definitely did not eat within my calorie goal 6 days, I was under or right around my goal 3 days for sure. As I said earlier, I didn't even track my calories from Wednesday on, so I'm not sure what the actual totals were, but they weren't good. I did weigh-in each day, so I accomplished that goal. I most definitely did not stay positive each day and did not blog at least 3 days. My last post was Sunday, which I'm disappointed about, I should have blogged more. One thing that I did stay up on was my water intake, I made sure to drink at least 64 ounces each day and usually surpassed it. I did continue to work through my food addiction, but sadly, I let my food addiction take over. I ate when I was stressed, frustrated, upset, and happy. Overall, I did not only eat for nourishment, but for comfort.

Now onto this weeks goals:

1. Lose .5 - 1 pound

2. Cardio - 4 sessions, 45 minutes/session (180 minutes)

3. Eat within my calorie goal (2290) at least 6 days 

4. Weigh-in daily for weight loss study

5. Stay Positive

6. Blog at least 3 days

7. Drink at least 64 oz of water/day

8. Continue to work through food addiction

This week I'm really hoping to do better and I'm going to work hard to achieve my goals. I have to work Wednesday, Thursday and Saturday, so I'll be a little busier, plus I'm planning on meeting up with a friend right after work on Wednesday. This week I'm going to focus more on nutrition and make sure to stick with my calorie goal and making healthier food choices. I'm also going to try and do some cardio each day I'm not working and do at least some strength training on the days that I do work.

Well, I'm off to go and spend some time with my family. I hope that you all have an amazing evening. Until next time! 

Frustration and Struggles

Hi, all!

Happy Friday! How are you all doing on this lovely day? It's already Friday, which is crazy, this week has absolutely flown by for me. This week has had it's ups and downs, right now it is more of a down. I'm trying to continue moving forward though. I keep beginning posts and not finishing them, so I'm finally going to finish a post again this week. Today I started my new job and I'm tired out! It has been a long time since I've had to be on my feet this long, but it is what it is, I'll get used to it. Now I'm just sitting with my feet up and relaxing for a little while before dinner.

Before I talk about anything else, I just need to get a frustration off my chest. I'm so tired of people judging other people, especially when they know nothing about what that person is going through. Everywhere I am turning I see people judging others and it drives me so crazy. Each of us has a story and it's not like anyone else's, so why are we judging others when we don't really know their story? Can we please just judging each other and just love and support? Please?

Now onto what I really want to talk about today, I'm struggling, plain and simple. The past few days I have allowed my food addiction to take control again and I feel like I'm spiraling out of control again. This needs to stop today. I have done well during the day and in the late evening, I make an extremely unhealthy food choice. I'm mad at myself for letting the food addiction take control again, but I'm going to fight it tooth and nail. Thankfully, last night I was able to keep my eating under control and I was under my calorie goal, hopefully, tonight I will be that successful as well.

The past few days I have been making excuses because I'm sick,  I "need" to eat that, I shouldn't exercise because I can't do much. Even yesterday morning I was making excuses as to why I wasn't going to workout, well, I nipped that in the bud and took a light 30-minute walk. Sometimes I just want to shake myself and say, 'what in the world are you thinking'? Yes, being sick does make working out more difficult, but I can still walk. When I'm walking, I can't give 100% because I can't breathe all that well, but I can still walk slowly without much difficulty. I'm done making excuses because I won't change myself when I'm making excuses.

Well, I'm off to continue relaxing and make some dinner. I hope that you all have an amazing evening and weekend. Until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In, Recap and Weekly Goals

Hi, all!

Happy Sunday! Did you all have a good week? My week was pretty good overall and I made some great progress toward my goals. Today is a dreary and hot day, I'm not a fan of it, at all! I don't mind the dreary, but this hot weather is not my cup of tea.

Since today's Sunday, that means my official weigh-in day is here and let me tell you, I had a fantastic result. This morning I weighed in at 309.4, which is a loss of 2.4 pounds!?! Throughout the week, I had a feeling that I would have a bit larger loss than last week, but I wasn't expecting a loss that big. Oh well, I'm pretty happy about it.

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 311.8 lbs

Current Weight: 309.4 lbs

Weight Lost: 5.6 lbs

My goal was to lose at least half a pound, well I definitely achieved that goal! In fact, I have achieved my monthly goal, in regards to pounds lost. This month I began at 313.4 pounds and my goal was to get down to around 310, well I achieved that and surpassed it. What's even better, I still have another full week to try and achieve more. Hopefully, I'll be down to at least 309 at the end of the month, which would be a loss of 4.4 pounds for the month, I would definitely take that big of a loss.

Okay, onto how I did with my goals this week. As I said, I definitely achieved my weight goal, in fact, I doubled it, almost tripled it. I worked out 6 of 7 days, which was above my goal. I need to workout 4 days this week to achieve my goal for number of sessions. Although I'm still working on achieving my workout session goal, I have surpassed my fitness minutes goal already. My goal was to have 510 minutes and I'm already at 908 minutes, with another week to go. When all is said and done, I'll have my goal at least doubled. I was at or below my calorie goal 6 days this past week, which was amazing. In fact, I was 432 calories under my weekly goal, which contributed to my bigger loss this week. I've weighed in daily, as needed for the weight loss study. It's amazing seeing the number getting lower each day (for the most part), it motivates me to keep making healthier choices. Thankfully, I was able to stay positive each day and even though I gave into temptation a few times, I made sure that it didn't throw me off track. I definitely achieved my blog post goal of 3 days, in fact, I blogged 6 days. I'm continuing to work through my food addiction, I will always be working through it. Right now, I'm just trying to find out what works for me, what keeps me from giving in to temptation. I've found that having the foods that tempt me is helpful. There are two types of foods that are major temptations for me, ice cream and chips. During the week, I had ice cream at night 2 or 3 times, but I measured the serving and made sure it would fit into my day. I did the same thing with chips, if I wanted them, I would have them and measure them. One thing I refuse to do is deprive myself of the foods I'm craving. I've learned that when I deprive myself, sooner or later I will binge on the food or foods I've been craving. Those types of days always throw me off, so I'm trying to avoid them.

Well, now that I recapped last week's goals, here are this weeks goals. As always, they are pretty much the same.

1. Lose .5 - 1 pound
2. Complete 4 cardio sessions, 30 minutes each (at least 120 minutes)
3. Eat within my calorie goal (2300) at least 5 days
4. Weigh-in daily
5. Stay positive
6. Blog at least 3 days
7. Continue to work through my food addiction

There you have it, my weigh-in, recap and goals for this week. It was an amazing week, in all facets and I can't wait to see what my results for this week. I hope that you all are having an amazing Sunday and have an even more amazing week. I wish you luck conquering all of your goals. Until next time!

~Sara~

Nutrition is Key

Hi, all!

Happy Friday! The weekend is upon us already, can you believe it? This week has simply flown by for me. Have you achieved your goals? Do you have any interesting plans for the weekend? My weekend is probably going to be quite boring, I have nothing fun planned.

Before I talk about anything else, I need to write about something extremely important. This morning, while on Facebook, a woman that I "like" posted something that talked about how important nutrition is. Working out is great and I definitely recommend it, but weight loss begins and ends with nutrition. Just a few minutes in the kitchen can erase your entire workout. That's why they say 'abs are made in the kitchen', if your nutrition isn't on key, then you're ruining your workout.
Before I started eating healthier, I didn't even realize how much I was eating. One thing that happened a lot is that I would snack while I was cooking. When I was waiting for something to cook on the stove or in the oven, I would get out some chips or something like that and just snack on them until my food was ready. And, of course, I would eat far too much of my actual meal as well. This is something that I've become aware of and now I watch myself. It's amazing how quickly our snacks add up, that's why I try and track everything that I put in my mouth now. Even a handful of something can add the calories up quickly.

Yesterday I had another good day and it seemed like I was eating so much. That's what happens when you eat lower calorie foods throughout the day. Today is on track to be exactly like that again, I've already logged my breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack, and dinner, and I'm only at 1200 calories. I'll have to add something else to my dinner, to help get closer to my goal. Yesterday I also got in a 30-minute walk. I'm loving the fact that I am back to walking at least 5 days each week. I have more energy throughout the day, I feel better about myself, I sleep better at night, and countless other benefits.

Well, I'm off. I hope that you all have an amazing afternoon and evening. Until next time!

~Sara~

Quick Update

Hi, all!

Happy Wednesday! How are you all doing on this beautiful day? I'm doing well and I'm enjoying the day. This week is going by fairly quickly now, I can't believe it's already Wednesday. Oh well, another week will be gone soon enough.

My day yesterday was off and on, I stayed under my calorie goal and I worked out, so that's a good thing. However, I ate more than I wanted to and I ate some chips while I was waiting for my lunch. I logged the chips and made sure they fit into my day, but they were not a part of my plan. Last night I was craving some ice cream, so I ate some and I enjoyed every single bite of it. Let me tell you, ice cream is not a part of my life every day, however, when I want some, I will make it fit into my day.

This morning I had an appointment which is just a few blocks from my house, so I walked there. I decided to wear my HRM and it's amazing how many more calories I burn while walking outside. If I had someone to walk with and the weather was nicer, then I may just walk outside more. I know a bunch of people who love walking/running outside by themselves, however, I find that to be incredibly boring. If I'm going to walk by myself, I'd rather just do it around the house. To each their own.

I know this is a rather short post, but I just don't have a great deal to say today. I hope you all are having a wonderful day. Until next time!

~Sara~

Mindset

Hi, all!

Happy Monday! How are all of you doing today? It's a pretty dreary day here, but I love it and am thankful nevertheless. Today marks a new week and we get a chance to begin new. So make some goals for yourself, get a workout in and make healthy food choices.

Yesterday I did not have a good day nutritionally, honestly, my whole weekend was full with unhealthy food choices. Today is a new day though and I will make healthier choices.It would be incredibly easy for me to just give in and continue making unhealthy food choices, however, I am choosing to be healthier. I see a difference in myself because before I would be eating the amount of calories I did over the weekend, plus many more. Honestly, I was eating at least 3500 calories each day, and that was probably a lower estimate. Now I feel sick to my stomach when I eat even 3000 calories in a day. What a difference! It's no wonder why I had no energy and felt incredibly lethargic before. Something that also contributed to that was the fact that most of my diet was carbs and fat, I did get a bit of protein, but only if there was some protein in those carbs and fats. When I look at the facts, it is amazing that I only weighed 315 pounds at my highest. If I would have continued on that path, I have no doubt that I would have eaten myself to death. I'm incredibly thankful that I decided to change my fitness and eating habits because I feel so much healthier and happier now. Who knows where I would be right now if I didn't make that change.

Today has been a wonderful day so far. I'm on track with my nutrition and I had a great 68-minute walk, with weights. This week and next week I'm set with a bunch of delicious food, even some for evening snacks, that will help me stay on track. Although some of the dinners are a bit higher calorie, I will make sure to stay on track and eat those higher calorie meals with moderation. Honestly, moderation is my goal. I will eat higher calorie foods sometimes, even unhealthy foods, but I will make sure that they fit into my calorie goal and I will only eat one serving of them, instead of multiple servings. I'm not going to give up the foods that I love, simply because I'm trying to lose weight. I'll lose weight while still eating my favorite foods, but they'll be healthier versions of them or smaller portions.

While I was writing this post I realized something that I need to stop. In my mind, I kept on say bad food choices instead of unhealthy food choices. This is something that I need to reevaluate in my mind because unhealthy and bad are two very different things. It's all a part of overcoming my food addiction and gaining a healthier relationship with food. If I see a food as "bad", that has a very negative connotation with it. However, if I say something in unhealthy, it means that it does not have a lot of health benefits. In my opinion, something being unhealthy is much better than something being bad. I'm going to work hard to change my mindset because it will help me a lot in the future.

Okay, I'm off to get some things done around the house. I hope that you all have a wonderful day and evening. Until next time!

~Sara~

Wedding

Hi, all!

Happy Friday! How are you all doing today? We've finally reached the weekend, how have all of your weeks gone? Mine has gone fairly well, but I'll talk more about that either Sunday or Monday. What are your plans for the weekend? I'll probably be getting coffee with my best friend in the morning, one more time before she heads home. Then my mom and I will be heading out to get some groceries for the next 2 weeks and then church in the evening.

Tonight I get to watch a friend, whom I've known for 17 years, get married to her best friend. I'm so excited for her and cannot wait to celebrate with her! Tonight I'll be eating some pie at the wedding (they're not having cake) and I'm going to enjoy it.

Last night I didn't have a good night nutritionally, I ate way more than I needed. I had a migraine last night and I think that coincided with my overeating a little bit. This morning I paid for it though, my stomach felt off. It's amazing how my stomach isn't used to eating as much anymore, especially so quickly. Today I'll get back on track though because I won't allow myself to move backward again. Everyone has a day every now and then where they are off, but then they have to get back on track again.

Sorry to cut this short but there are a variety of things I have to do before the wedding tonight. I need to wrap the gift, sign the card, paint my nails and a few other things to get ready. Plus, I need to have lunch quickly before I do all of that. I hope that you all have an amazing day. Until next time!

~Sara~