My Life Story

My faith is an integral part of my life, so I thought I would share my testimony with all of you.

I have always grown up in a Christian home, from birth to age 7 or 8 we were Catholic, but then we decided to make a change. We found this wonderful Evangelical Free Church in our town (that we still attend to this day), and it really has changed our lives for the better. It was at this church that I met my best friend, those 15 years ago. Here is a picture of my best friend and I at a wedding in July of 2012, we have sure come a long way since meeting 16 years ago. :)

Ever since I can remember, I have been overweight, even as a child. I've gone back and looked at report cards and I was always heavier than most of the children were but I was also a lot taller in the early years. As I got older, the weight just kept creeping on, and sadly I didn't really try to do anything about it. My excess weight caused a lot of stress in my life because while attending the public school in my town, I was made fun of a lot. I was heavier than a lot of the people at the school and I had very few friends. I would come home crying every day because I hated school so much (and that was strange because I absolutely love school, to this day). In February of 2005, I was finally able to make a change and I transferred to the Christian school in my town. The change was amazing, I was finally loving school again. And the people at this school were so different, they didn't make fun of me because of my weight, they accepted me and I made friends.

But I still couldn't forget all of the horrible things that the people from public had said to me. In June of 2005, I hit a very low point in my life, I struggled with depression a lot. I had no self-worth or self-confidence, I thought I was just fat and ugly and that everyone would be better off without me. So one night I tried to take my own life (obviously it didn't work, and I am thankful for that now). That landed me with a week in a hospital to help me work though the problems I was having emotionally, along with months of counseling after the fact. This was definitely not my proudest moment, but I am glad that I went through it as it has helped me become the person I am today.

Starting at about age 16 I got my first boyfriend, and that was just the beginning of a long 4 years. My first relationship wasn't horrible, it lasted 3 months and introduced me to one of my friends that I still have today. But after he and I broke up, I yearned for another relationship. As much as I tried, I wasn't able to find someone in my area that would date me, so I turned to searching online (there is nothing wrong with online dating, I met my fiance online). The guys that would contact me would only be searching for one thing and I wasn't willing to give them what they wanted. So we would lose contact or break up (if we were exclusively together) and I would go back to looking for another guy. There were a few that ended up being something but they all ended because I wouldn't sleep with them or because I was over weight.

Then in May of 2008 I graduated from high school, at that point, it was the best time of my life at the time. I was in a serious relationship with a guy who lived in Virginia and moved out there to be closer to him. Well that lasted about a month, we broke up because he was afraid to tell his family about me because I was over weight (I still keep in contact with him and he definitely has a type, his current girl looks quite similar to me just shorter). So I moved back home and a few month later, the absolute worst even of my life happened. My best friend and I were in a car accident that took her life. Besides a bunch of bruises/cuts, a laceration of my lower back, and glass in my right wrist, I was fine physically. But emotionally, I was a wreck. After her death, I gained 65 lbs which brought me up to my highest weight ever.

I needed to have the glass in my wrist surgically removed so after I was healed from that and I wasn't an emotional wreck, I started searching for another relationship, mostly because I was incredibly lonely after my best friend's death. I had one decent relationship at that point, but that's because it was with someone that I am friends with. That relationship didn't work out and I was searching again. By the time that I hit 20, I began to realize my self-worth a little more. And I began college, finally, I started studying Marketing at a local technical school. I met some amazing people who I am still friends with today, and I cannot thank them enough for helping me gain more self-confidence and self-worth.

Once I hit 20, I finally stopped searching for a relationship and just let my life happen. There was a guy or two that I liked from my town, but nothing ever happened with them. In September of 2011, I changed my lifestyle, I started to exercise and eat better. Now that is when I really started to get more confidence and I saw that I was able to accomplish something important. It's a daily struggle but I know that I can accomplish anything I set my mind to.

1 comment:

  1. Oh my gosh girl.. I am tearing up reading your story. You are beautiful inside and out and such an inspiration!! I'm so sorry to hear about your best friend.. I can't even begin to imagine how difficult that was.

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