Frustrations

Hi, all!

Today has been rather ify. I started off the morning feeling fantastic because I had made it to 5 days binge free. And I will say that I am still binge free but there was a close call for a few hours earlier today. At around 10AM I went to submit some school work and I found out that I lost everything for this week and the next few weeks. I went into full panic mode and had a rough panic attack. Until around 12:30 I fought off a binge hard. By then I won the battle! I did not binge today and I am so freaking proud of myself. Day 6 binge free is almost complete and I cannot wait to write tomorrow that I am working on 1-week binge free. There have been a few times where I almost gave in today but my mindset is changing. I knew that binging would not change my situation, all of my work would still be lost and I would have just set myself back.

In addition to almost binging, something else that brought my day down some was the fact that I was finally able to weigh myself today. The number on the scale was appalling and I was not expecting it at all. Even thinking about it now is really hard...

Starting Weight: ??

Current Weight: 343.6

Pounds Lost: -

Well, there it is, I am being honest about all of this, even when it is difficult. It is no wonder why my wedding dress didn't fit. I thought that I was around the same weight but apparently I gained 15 pounds. This almost brought me to a binge but instead, I am using it as motivation. I will not let it control me anymore. Losing weight may help to ease some of my arthritis and fibromyalgia pain and that is something that I desperately want. It is difficult but I am determined to finally lose all of this weight and keep it off. 

I am still feeling somewhat down but I am trying to enjoy my evening. Here's to day 6 binge free. Until next time. 

~Sara~

Ups and Downs

Hi, all!

Happy Monday! How are you all doing today? I’m doing okay, last week was incredibly busy and filled with many ups and downs. Honestly, I’m really glad that it’s a new week and I get to start fresh. This week my goal is to not eat out at all and eat at or a little below my calorie goal each day. I really need to get my nutrition under control and begin making healthier choices every day.

I began last week by doing quite well, Sunday and Monday my calories were quite low and Tuesday I was about 100 under my goal. At that point, I was feeling good about myself and how well I was doing, but then that changed on Wednesday. I had a long day of class and I talked to my best friend when I got home and then I was feeling sort of hungry. Instead of grabbing one of the snacks I keep in the house for occasions such as this, I went online and ordered a big pizza and a few other things. I ate a little of it that night but saved the rest of it for the next day. On Thursday, I was feeling really down about what I had done the night before and wanted to just throw the food away but I can’t really afford to do that. So, I came up with a plan to eat the food that I had bought but make it fit into my calorie range. That planned worked until the afternoon because I had an incredibly stressful morning and then I let my stress take over and I pigged out on the pizza. That day, I ate 7 slices of large pizza and then I had a few other things in the evening. I honestly don’t know how many calories I ate that day but it happened. Friday I decided to start fresh and I did well, I was about 160 calories under my goal for the day. Saturday came around and I was having a fantastic day, I was ahead on my to-do list, my dinner was in the slow cooker and I was on track to being at or under my calorie goal for the day. Around 4 PM I was starting to get hungry and again, instead of grabbing a snack I ordered some food. I ate more than I needed to again and felt unsatisfied after. At that point, I saw how easily my nutrition was consumed by my stress and boredom, so now I’m trying to focus more on my nutrition and making healthier choices.

The few days that I ate too much led me to gain weight for the week. Yesterday I weighed myself and I wasn’t happy with what I saw. I gained a pound last week because of a few bad choices. Last week I sabotaged myself, which is hard to admit but it’s the truth. This needs to stop, now. I know that I won’t be perfect with my nutrition all the time and sometimes I’ll make unhealthy food choices and that’s okay. The thing that I’m trying to do right now is have more healthy days than unhealthy. When I do have an unhealthy day, I am going to try and not eat so much. I went and got groceries yesterday and I made sure to grab a few different types of snacks, so that if I am craving a certain thing that I can eat a little of it and not binge on it.

Well, this is where I am signing off. I have class tonight and I have a few things to get done this afternoon before I leave. I hope that you all have an amazing week! Until next time!
~Sara~

Weigh-In, Recapping Goals and Weekly Goals

Hi, all!

Happy Sunday! How are you all doing on this gorgeous day? The sun is currently shining, however, it did rain this morning. I'm sorry that I haven't been updating much lately, it's been a struggle. This coming week I'm definitely going to try harder all around.

It's Sunday, which means it's time to share my results for this past week. I'll be honest, I had an absolutely horrendous week, both nutritionally and with my fitness. I was lacking the motivation to work out and I made far too many unhealthy food choices. Also, I ate more calories than I wanted or needed. Honestly, I only tracked my food three days and those were the only three days that I made healthier food choices.

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 306.5 lbs

Current Weight: 306.2 lbs

Weight Lost: 8.8 lbs

Amazingly enough, I lost .3 pounds last week. I truly do not know how that happened, but it did, and I won't turn it down. I've been feeling a bit down on myself because of my lack of progress this month. So today I decided to look back at my numbers from April 27th and I'm actually sort of amazed by how much progress I've made since then. In 48 days, I've lost 7.2 pounds. So, in just about 7 weeks, I've lost 7.2 pounds, which equates to .97 pounds each week. Losing almost a pound each week is nothing to be sad about, that's continuous progress. Yes, I have a long way to go still, but I'm making progress either way.

Now on to recapping my goals from last week, let's just say, I did horribly with them. Plain and simple. I didn't lose at least .5 pound, but I did lose .3, and after my week, I'll count that as a win. I did work out four times but only had 138 minutes instead of my goal of 180. I most definitely did not eat within my calorie goal 6 days, I was under or right around my goal 3 days for sure. As I said earlier, I didn't even track my calories from Wednesday on, so I'm not sure what the actual totals were, but they weren't good. I did weigh-in each day, so I accomplished that goal. I most definitely did not stay positive each day and did not blog at least 3 days. My last post was Sunday, which I'm disappointed about, I should have blogged more. One thing that I did stay up on was my water intake, I made sure to drink at least 64 ounces each day and usually surpassed it. I did continue to work through my food addiction, but sadly, I let my food addiction take over. I ate when I was stressed, frustrated, upset, and happy. Overall, I did not only eat for nourishment, but for comfort.

Now onto this weeks goals:

1. Lose .5 - 1 pound

2. Cardio - 4 sessions, 45 minutes/session (180 minutes)

3. Eat within my calorie goal (2290) at least 6 days 

4. Weigh-in daily for weight loss study

5. Stay Positive

6. Blog at least 3 days

7. Drink at least 64 oz of water/day

8. Continue to work through food addiction

This week I'm really hoping to do better and I'm going to work hard to achieve my goals. I have to work Wednesday, Thursday and Saturday, so I'll be a little busier, plus I'm planning on meeting up with a friend right after work on Wednesday. This week I'm going to focus more on nutrition and make sure to stick with my calorie goal and making healthier food choices. I'm also going to try and do some cardio each day I'm not working and do at least some strength training on the days that I do work.

Well, I'm off to go and spend some time with my family. I hope that you all have an amazing evening. Until next time! 

Weigh-In and Goals

Hi, all!

Happy Sunday! How are you all doing on this gloomy day? I'm doing alright, definitely tired and ready to relax for a bit before bed. It has been an incredibly long day, I had to run some errands this morning and then I worked this evening. Don't get me wrong, it's nice to be busier again, but I'm definitely tired out. My normal busy doesn't usually involve being on my feet this long, but I'll get used to it soon enough. Here's hoping that it'll be sooner rather than later.

Well, it's Sunday, which means it's weigh-in day. My week was pretty off, I had more days off than on and I let my food addiction take over. I'm not proud to admit that, but I promised to be honest with myself and all of you.

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 308.9 lbs

Current Weight: 306.5 lbs

Weight Lost: 8.5 lbs

Amazingly enough, I did lose weight. It was probably because there was one day where I was about 1000 calories under, my first day of work. The days that I did go over my goal, thankfully I didn't go over by a lot. Either way, I lost 2.4 pounds last week. This week is a new one and I'm going to try to work harder.

Now onto reviewing my goals from last week, overall, I didn't have a great week. As I said, I lost 2.4 pounds, which surpasses my goal. I did have four official workouts, but I only had 144 minutes instead of my goal of 180. However, I did begin work, so a few days I was on my feet more than usual. My calorie goal was definitely not achieved, I was only on three days last week. Thankfully, I wasn't over by too much each day, but it is still not as good as I had hoped. I did weigh-in each day, so that goal was achieved. I stayed positive each day, so another goal achieved. My blogging was down this week and I think I only posted twice, but it is what it is, hopefully, this coming week will be better. My water intake was great, I drank 64 oz of water or more each day. I'm going to count my food addiction goal as failed this week because I let it overtake my day way too often last week. As I said, it wasn't a very good week.

Here are this coming week's goals, they're pretty much the same as last week, but I'm hoping this week will be better.

1. Lose .5 - 1 pound

2. Cardio - 4 sessions, 45 minutes/session (180 minutes)

3. Eat within my calorie goal (2300) at least 6 days 

4. Weigh-in daily for weight loss study

5. Stay Positive

6. Blog at least 3 days

7. Drink at least 64 oz of water/day

8. Continue to work through food addiction

9. Work each of my scheduled shifts without letting my pain get in the way

Okay, well this post is long enough and I'm exhausted, so I'm off to bed. If anyone wants to offer a foot rub before I go to sleep, I wouldn't say no. I hope that you all have had a wonderful day and have an amazing week. Until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In, Recap, Goals and a New Month

Hi, all!

Happy Monday and happy June! It's a new month, which means it's a new beginning and a great time to come up with some new goals. Today is a gorgeous day, a high of 66 and sunny. Don't forget to write out some new goals today and get working toward them. I have so much to cover today because I haven't blogged in a few days. Sorry about that, by the way, over the weekend my cold turned into something a lot more. I'm still feeling pretty under the weather, but I'm trying to move forward with my week.

Yesterday was Sunday which means I had my official weigh-in. My results were not where I wanted them to be, especially as it was the end of the month, but it is what it is.

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 308.8 lbs

Current Weight: 308.9 lbs

Weight Lost: 6.1 lbs

As you can see, I gained .1 pound, so I'm not all that happy, but it could have been a lot worse. I need to be honest with everyone though, I didn't do as well with my fitness or nutrition this past week and you can see that with my weigh-in. Most days throughout the week, I was under my calorie goal, however, I made some unhealthy food choices. Plus, my calorie burns from my work outs were down a little this week and I know I didn't push myself as hard. Overall, I'm not happy with how this week went but, these things happen. Today is a new day and a new week, so I'm going to try harder.

Now onto my recap of my weekly goals, I actually accomplished all of these except for my weight goal. As seen above, I gained .1 pound, so my goal of losing .5-1 pound was not accomplished. The positive that I'm going to take out of last week though is that I worked out 5 days and had 214 minutes, which is 94 minutes over my goal. Also, I ate within my calorie goal 5 days, which was my goal. Each day I weighed in, tried to stay positive, blogged 5 times and continued to work through my food addiction. Overall, I did pretty well with my goals for the week and I'm going to keep working hard.

Okay, now it's time to recap my monthly goals and share my results. I didn't achieve my goal of losing 3 pounds, but I did lose 2.5 pounds, so that's still a win in my book. I worked out 23 of 31 days, which surpasses my goal and I had 1118 fitness minutes, which is a little more than double my goal. I ate within my calorie goal 24 of 31 days, which surpasses my goal of 21 days. Each day I weighed in, stayed positive, blogged 24 days (double my goal) and continued to work through my food addiction. Although I didn't achieve all of my goals, I do think that I made some good progress in May, especially with my food addiction. I took more steps forward than I did backwards, so May was definitely a good month!

June is upon us, which means it's time for some new monthly goals. My goals for this month are going to be pretty similar to May's goals, but I'm going to tweak them a little bit.

1. Lose 3 pounds
2. Cardio - at least 22 sessions, 45 minutes/session (1000 minutes/month)
3. Eat within my calorie goal at least 21 days (out of 30)
4. Weigh-in daily for weight loss study
5. Stay Positive
6. Blog at least 12 times
7. Continue to work through food addiction

I increased my fitness minute goal because I'm averaging at least 1000 each month. Also, I increased my amount of days eating within my calorie goal. One thing that I like to do when coming up with monthly goals is to take a look at my yearly goals and see how I'm coming along with those goals. I did that today and I already know that I won't accomplish my weight loss goal for the year because I'd have to lose 11.7 pounds each month, so that goal is definitely out. I'm not going to change that goal but I know I won't accomplish it, instead I'm going to push myself and try to lose between 24 and 48 pounds the rest of the year (1-2 pounds/week).

Finally, we're on to the goals for this week, they'll be pretty similar to what they always are, but there will be a few minor changes.

1. Lose .5 - 1 pound
2. Cardio - 4 sessions, 45 minutes/session (180 minutes)
3. Eat within my calorie goal (2300) at least 6 days 
4. Weigh-in daily for weight loss study
5. Stay Positive
6. Blog at least 3 days
7. Drink at least 64 oz of water/day
8. Continue to work through food addiction

Well, there you have it. This has been a pretty long post, so I hope you've all bared with me through it all. Well, I'm off. I'm going to get a pretty light walk in today, even though I'm sick. No more excuses because I won't see results unless I push myself. I hope that you all have an absolutely amazing day, week and month. Don't worry about what happened earlier this year, last month, last week or even yesterday, it's a new day. We each have a new beginning and we need to push forward. Until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In, Recap and Weekly Goals

Hi, all!

Happy Sunday! How are you all doing on this lovely day? Today marks the beginning of a new week, did you achieve your goals last week? Don't forget to set some goals this week! It's in the lower-70's here today, which makes me a very happy girl. Today's been quite busy, I had church in the morning and then had to run some errands for half of the afternoon. Now I'm back home and able to relax for a little while.

It's Sunday, which means it's my official weigh-in day! I was surprised by the number on the scale today, but I'm trying to not let it bother me.

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 309.4 lbs

Current Weight: 308.8 lbs

Weight Lost: 6.2 lbs

I weighed in at 308.8, which is a loss of .6 pounds. Honestly, I was expecting a bigger loss this week but I'm not worrying about it too much. I think I'm retaining a bit of water because I've been drinking a lot of water lately. Especially because my nutrition and exercise warranted a bigger loss. Weighing in daily has made me focus more on the number on the scale, so that is something that I definitely need to work on in the coming weeks. I'm going to continue weighing in daily because of the study I'm participating in, but I'm going to focus less on the number and more on how I'm feeling each day.

Okay, now it's time for a recap of last weeks goals. I lost .6 pounds which means I achieved my weight goal. During the week, I worked out 4 times totaling 197 minutes, which is 77 minutes over my goal. One thing I'm really proud of is the fact that I ate within my calorie goal each day! This is something that rarely happens but I'm making changes to myself and it's definitely showing in my eating habits. I weighed in daily for the weight loss study. Each day I stayed positive, even on those days where I was feeling fatigued. Throughout the week, I blogged every day except one, so I definitely achieved that goal. I'm really proud of the progress I've made with my food addiction this week. I didn't stop for fast food three separate times when I normally would have and I made good food choices throughout the week. Most importantly, I didn't let food control my life, I was in control. That is huge for me! Food always consumed my thoughts but now it's not. I can't even begin to describe how amazing this feels. I know that it won't always be like this and there will be certain times where maintaining control will be difficult, but I'm thankful for the easier time I had this past week.

Now onto this weeks goals, they are exactly the same as last week.

1. Lose .5 - 1 pound
2. Complete 4 cardio sessions, 30 minutes each (at least 120 minutes)
3. Eat within my calorie goal (2300) at least 5 days
4. Weigh-in daily
5. Stay positive
6. Blog at least 3 days
7. Continue to work through my food addiction

I'm hoping that starting my new job this week won't affect me achieving my goals negatively. Okay, well, this post has gotten long enough as it is, so I'm off. I hope that you all have a wonderful afternoon. Also, if I don't get to post tomorrow, Happy Memorial Day! Until next time!

~Sara~ 

Weigh-In, Recap and Weekly Goals

Hi, all!

Happy Sunday! Did you all have a good week? My week was pretty good overall and I made some great progress toward my goals. Today is a dreary and hot day, I'm not a fan of it, at all! I don't mind the dreary, but this hot weather is not my cup of tea.

Since today's Sunday, that means my official weigh-in day is here and let me tell you, I had a fantastic result. This morning I weighed in at 309.4, which is a loss of 2.4 pounds!?! Throughout the week, I had a feeling that I would have a bit larger loss than last week, but I wasn't expecting a loss that big. Oh well, I'm pretty happy about it.

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 311.8 lbs

Current Weight: 309.4 lbs

Weight Lost: 5.6 lbs

My goal was to lose at least half a pound, well I definitely achieved that goal! In fact, I have achieved my monthly goal, in regards to pounds lost. This month I began at 313.4 pounds and my goal was to get down to around 310, well I achieved that and surpassed it. What's even better, I still have another full week to try and achieve more. Hopefully, I'll be down to at least 309 at the end of the month, which would be a loss of 4.4 pounds for the month, I would definitely take that big of a loss.

Okay, onto how I did with my goals this week. As I said, I definitely achieved my weight goal, in fact, I doubled it, almost tripled it. I worked out 6 of 7 days, which was above my goal. I need to workout 4 days this week to achieve my goal for number of sessions. Although I'm still working on achieving my workout session goal, I have surpassed my fitness minutes goal already. My goal was to have 510 minutes and I'm already at 908 minutes, with another week to go. When all is said and done, I'll have my goal at least doubled. I was at or below my calorie goal 6 days this past week, which was amazing. In fact, I was 432 calories under my weekly goal, which contributed to my bigger loss this week. I've weighed in daily, as needed for the weight loss study. It's amazing seeing the number getting lower each day (for the most part), it motivates me to keep making healthier choices. Thankfully, I was able to stay positive each day and even though I gave into temptation a few times, I made sure that it didn't throw me off track. I definitely achieved my blog post goal of 3 days, in fact, I blogged 6 days. I'm continuing to work through my food addiction, I will always be working through it. Right now, I'm just trying to find out what works for me, what keeps me from giving in to temptation. I've found that having the foods that tempt me is helpful. There are two types of foods that are major temptations for me, ice cream and chips. During the week, I had ice cream at night 2 or 3 times, but I measured the serving and made sure it would fit into my day. I did the same thing with chips, if I wanted them, I would have them and measure them. One thing I refuse to do is deprive myself of the foods I'm craving. I've learned that when I deprive myself, sooner or later I will binge on the food or foods I've been craving. Those types of days always throw me off, so I'm trying to avoid them.

Well, now that I recapped last week's goals, here are this weeks goals. As always, they are pretty much the same.

1. Lose .5 - 1 pound
2. Complete 4 cardio sessions, 30 minutes each (at least 120 minutes)
3. Eat within my calorie goal (2300) at least 5 days
4. Weigh-in daily
5. Stay positive
6. Blog at least 3 days
7. Continue to work through my food addiction

There you have it, my weigh-in, recap and goals for this week. It was an amazing week, in all facets and I can't wait to see what my results for this week. I hope that you all are having an amazing Sunday and have an even more amazing week. I wish you luck conquering all of your goals. Until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In, Recap and Weekly Goals

Hi, all! 

Happy Sunday! How are you all doing on this rainy weekend day? It's a bit cooler here today, but I love it! These 60 degree days can stay here as long as they want! How did your week go? Personally, I cannot believe it is already the weekend, the week has flown by for me. Since it's Sunday, there are a few things that I want to talk about today. First, I'll be recapping my weekend. Second, it's my official weigh-in day. Third, I'll recap how my week went and I'll be sharing my results for the week. 

I'll start with Friday. I had an amazing time at the wedding on Friday night! The bride was beautiful, as she always is, and it was wonderful to celebrate her binding herself to her best friend for the rest of their lives. I still can't really believe that the bride and I are old enough to be getting married, it seems like only yesterday we were 7-years-old and meeting for the first time. It's crazy how fast life passes us by. I also was able to spend some time with a few of my friends and I talked to some individuals whom I haven't seen in a very long time. I'm proud of myself, even while having some pie, I was able to stick right around my calorie goal! The reason for that is that I didn't get seconds, had some of the fruit as an appetizer, and stayed away from the candy bar. Small changes. 

Yesterday didn't go as well as Friday did, I made a variety of unhealthy food choices throughout the day and evening, my stomach is hurting this morning because of it as well. During lunch and an afternoon snack alone, I ate almost all of my calorie goal, plus I had my normal breakfast, dinner, and an evening snack. Needless to say, it wasn't a good day. It almost seemed like since I made one unhealthy choice, I let myself make more unhealthy choices as the day continued. It was definitely a step back, but I'll move past it. 

Today is mother's day and our meal tonight will be pretty calorie rich. My mom doesn't want to cook tonight, so instead of letting me cook, yesterday she picked up some take and bake pizzas from a local place. This pizza is was too delicious and it's a good thing that we don't eat it often. I know that I will eat more of it than I need, pizza is one of those things for me. That's why if I do eat it, I make a personal one for myself, where I can control the calorie count and ingredients that go into it. Today I'm going to make healthy choices throughout the day and then at dinner, I'll eat with moderation. 

Okay, onto my weigh-in. This week I weighed in at 311.8, which is a loss of .6 pounds from last week! It's not a huge loss, but I'll take it, especially since I was off a few days this week. 

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 312.4 lbs

Current Weight: 311.8 lbs

Weight Lost: 3.2 lbs

Now onto the recap of my weekly goals. My goal was to lose .5-1 pound and I achieved that goal! :) I also achieved my fitness minutes goal, in fact, I surpassed it by 123 minutes. I typically won't get quite so many minutes in a week, but a few days I go in extra long workouts. I did achieve my goal of eating within my calorie goal at least 5 days, however, I'm still not necessarily happy with how I did nutritionally this week. I weighed in daily for the weight loss study. For the most part, I stayed positive. I definitely blogged 3 times this week, in fact, it was more than that. I drank at least 64 oz of water each day. Finally, I did continue to work through my food addiction. There were positives and negatives this week, but I think overall, I am making strides. Now, the one thing that I didn't accomplish this week was completing 50 tasks, but I did do 31. 

I'm making good progress on my monthly goals as well. I've lost 1.6 of 3 pounds thus far, 1.4 pounds to go to reach my goal. I've had 7 of 17 workouts and have 387 of 510 minutes completed. I've eaten within my calorie goal 6 of 21 days and had 3 of 10 days out of my calorie goal. I've weighed in daily and stayed positive. So far, I've completed 50 of 200 tasks. Finally, I've blogged 7 of 12 times. I am definitely on track to achieve all of my goals for this month. 

My goals for this coming week are the same as last week. Each week they'll probably stay the same because they are all helping me work toward my monthly and yearly goals. 

1. Lose .5-1 pound

2. Complete four 30-minute cardio sessions (120 minutes)

3. Eat within my calorie goal (2320) at least 5 days

4. Weigh-in daily - for weight loss study

5. Complete at least 50 tasks

6. Stay positive

7. Blog at least 3 days/week

8. Continue to work through my food addiction

9. Drink at least 64 oz of water/day

Well, there are my goals and I can't wait to report how I do on them next week. This is where I'm going to sign off. I've got to go and make myself some lunch and do some reading while my mom is celebrating mothers day with my parents and sisters. Then we'll be having my brother's family come over tonight to celebrate mother's day. I hope you all have an amazing mother's day and week. Until next time!

~Sara~

Interview and Other Randomness

Hi, all!

Happy Monday! How are you all doing today? It's a beautiful day, the sun is shining and it's in the low 70's, I definitely won't complain about that. How was your weekend? Mine was wonderful, I had a healthy and happy weekend. :)

I had an interview this morning and it went well, they're sending me some paperwork soon and then I'll be making my decision for sure on whether or not I want to accept the position. It would be a great position and helpful toward the future, as long as it's legit, so only time will tell. Then I went out for coffee with my best friend and we spent a few hours together. It was an amazing morning.

This morning when I weighed in, my hard work from last week showed. So, it seems that my body is finally adjusting to my new healthier eating and fitness routine. I'm trying to add more strength training into my routine, so I'm adding some dumbbells while I'm walking since my hip still isn't 100%. I can definitely tell the difference when I walk with weights though and I'm going to continue to do this. Yesterday I did well, both nutritionally and with my fitness. I was under my calorie goal and had a nice 38-minute walk. :) Today is going well thus far, however, at lunch I did eat a bit more than I had planned. I'm still on track for the day, especially after my 67-minute walk.

Well, I'm off to go and make dinner for the family. I hope that you all have an amazing evening. So until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In and Looking Back

Hi, all!

Happy Sunday! How are you all doing today? How are all of your goals coming along? Mine as going fairly well thus far. :) It's been a wonderful weekend and I'm looking forward to seeing what this week has in store. Plus, my best friend got to town today and we'll be spending time together numerous times throughout the week. :) I'm going to go over how Friday and Saturday went before I say anything else.

I had a good day on Friday until the evening. I ate more than I wanted to at dinner and then my two youngest nieces and I made cookies together. If I wouldn't have eaten so many cookies, I would have been fine. I did workout more to make up for it, so ultimately I was only 80 calories over, but it wasn't as a good a day as I had hoped. I let my food addiction take over, it's as simple as that. I did not make good food choices in the evening and I ate way too much. Overcoming this addiction is hard work, but I need to move forward. One bad day will not dictate how the rest of the week and month goes. On Friday I received the scale from the weight loss study I'm a part of and I'm in love with the scale. UCLA sent me a $100 scale for free! Plus, I downloaded a free app on my phone and the scale syncs with it, so that's amazing. The even better news, when the study is over, I get to keep this scale. :)

Saturday was wonderful. I wasn't planning on working out, but I felt the need in the morning. So, I got in a nice 25-minute walk. Then in the evening, I made this delicious peanut butter, chocolate, strawberry/banana smoothie, and it was healthy! It tasted more like a shake and I added some protein powder to it, so it had some added protein. :) I love having a blender again! I weighed in for the weight loss study's official beginning weight and it was back up to 311.4, so my loss from a few days ago was not correct (just as I suspected). So, I'm correctly my weight from 308 back up to 311. Overall, I had a great day Saturday! I was under my calorie goal and worked out. :)

Okay, now on to today. I'm weighing in every day for the study, but Sunday is my official weigh-in day. So here are those results:

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 311.4 lbs

Current Weight: 312.4 lbs

Weight Lost: 2.6 lbs

Well, the scale showed a gain this morning. I'm not too worried about it because I know I didn't eat enough to actually gain a pound. In fact, according to my records, I should have lost at least .75 lbs. So, I'm probably retaining water or something like that. I worked hard last week and I know that as soon as my body is used to what I'm doing, I'll start seeing results. This week I'm planning on adding more strength training, at least 3 days and cardio at least 5 days. 

Tomorrow morning I have an interview for a freelance data entry position, so I'm pretty excited! It's just a temporary position, but it could possibly lead to other projects and give me some more experience. Something else exciting, my best friend is getting into town later this afternoon and she'll be here for a week! I'm either going to see her when she gets here or we're getting together tomorrow sometime. :) I can't wait to have some one-on-one time with her again. Well, I'm off, I've got to do some things around the house and then make some lunch. I hope you all have an amazing day and week. Until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In and Measurements

Hi, all!

Happy Thursday! How are you all doing on this beautiful day? Can you all believe that it's the final day of April? I can't, this month has simply flown by and I cannot wait to see what May has in store for me. My one final paper has been graded and I'm ending the class with a 100%, which makes me incredibly happy.

It is the final day of April, which means that I had a weigh-in and took my measurements. I loved the results I saw at my weigh-in, although, I do believe that the number was off. So, I'm not going to get too excited about that 5 lb. loss, if it's at that number or lower at my next weigh-in, then I'll get excited.

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 313.4 lbs

Current Weight: 308.4 lbs

Weight Lost: 5 lbs

My measurements ended up being just as I assumed they would, each one of the numbers increased a small amount. That's what happens when you fall off the wagon for a few months and gain back most of the weight you've lost. I've gained 15.96 inches since February, which is insane. Honestly, I can't believe it, but when the tape measure is around me and that's the number I'm seeing, I know it's true. This morning, I also ordered a fat caliper, one that many professionals use because I wanted to be able to measure my body fat percentage more accurately. Also, it will help me see my results in a way other than the number on the scale. I'll be honest, when I first saw that I gained back all of this weight, I felt really depressed about it, I couldn't believe that I let myself get back to this weight. Finally, I'm accepting the fact that I do weigh over 300 pounds again and that I need to work hard again if I want to get to my goal weight. My problem before was that I never worked on my food addiction. I did workout and ate less, which led to me losing weight. However, I didn't address the deeper issues and that is what led me to get back to this point. But, now it's time to move forward and look toward the future. 

I had another good day yesterday, which I'm very happy about. I was under my calorie goal again and had a great 40-minute walk. I'm feeling really motivated and wanting to workout even more, but my hip won't allow that right now. Hopefully, my hip will be feeling up to more, including lower body strength training, soon because I'm really missing being able to do more. This coming week, I'm going to begin upper body strength training along with my walking.

Well, I'm off. Time to have some lunch and then create a few upper body strength training routines for next week. I hope that you all have an amazing day. Until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In

Hi all!

Happy Sunday! How are you all doing today? It is a very snowy day, the Midwest is being attacked with a huge snow storm. Thankfully, my area is only getting 4-7" of snow and now the almost foot that many other areas are getting. The snow is sidelining my best friend from getting back here when she wanted to, but hopefully she'll get here tomorrow by lunch. 

Yesterday was weigh-in day, I was feeling much better about it than I did last week. Although I gained weight from my last official weigh-in, I know that I did lose weight since last week. I did an unofficial weigh-in for the weight loss challenge I am a part of a few days before my official weigh-in was supposed to be last week and I was up 3.8 pounds. I know not all of it was actual weight gain because of my added strength training and water retention, however, seeing that number really messed with my head. This morning when I stepped on the scale though, I was down 2 pounds, so that is encouraging. 

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 297.2 lbs

Current Weight: 295.2 lbs

Weight Lost: 19.8 lbs

Last week when I saw that number on the scale, it set a precedent for how I felt the entire week. I honestly try so hard to not let a small gain or maintaining, get me down, but it is really difficult. It was just added stress and it was more than I could handle at that moment, and it definitely dragged my week down. I did workout, around 140 minutes, I did strength training 3 days, but my nutrition was off. My days were wonderful, but in the evening I ate more than I needed to. Honestly, I'm surprised that I saw a 2 pound loss this week. I am hoping that this week will be better nutritionally and I will see another loss.

This week is going to be a busy one, I hope to get a bunch of school work done, along with spending a great deal of time with my best friend while she is here. So, I don't know how much time I'll have to blog, hopefully I'll be able to blog either Wednesday or Friday, but I won't make any promises. I'll be back next Sunday or Monday though. Tomorrow I'm doing measurements, so I will share those results in my next post. I'm off to get some school work done. I hope that you all have an amazing day and evening. Until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In and Weekly Goals

Hi all!

Happy Monday! How are you all doing today? It's a eh sort of day here in southeastern Wisconsin, both weather wise and emotionally. That loss in the football game yesterday afternoon was brutal, but it is what it is, congratulations to the Seahawks. Now it's time to focus on schoolwork even more and looking ahead to baseball season :)

Yesterday was weigh-in day and I was pretty excited for it, I had a great week in regards to fitness and nutrition. I had 200 official fitness minutes and bunch of unofficial fitness minutes on Saturday. I was also about 1200 calories under my weekly calorie goal before exercise calories were added. I didn't have a huge loss, but the water weight is finally coming off a little. -.4 pounds last week, so I can't complain. Hopefully the water weight will completely come off soon though. 

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 293.8 lbs

Current Weight: 293.4 lbs

Weight Lost: 21.6 lbs

My goals for this week:  

1. At least 200 fitness minutes 

2. Lift Monday, Wednesday, Friday

3. East 2200 calories daily (15400 for the week)

4. Get through week 5 on my schoolwork

5. Stay positive (no matter my motivation level)

6. Blog 3 days

7. Push myself (especially with my strength training sessions)

Time to go and work on my schoolwork now. I'm about 2 weeks ahead of schedule, so here's hoping that this week I'll be able to keep that pace and get even further ahead. I hope that you all have a great day. Until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In and Misleading Scale

Hi all!

Happy Monday! How are you all doing today? It's an absolutely beautiful day here, a bit cold, but beautiful. It's suppose to be warming up this week, today is going to be our coldest day. By the end of the week, it'll be in the upper 30s again! :) 

Yesterday was my official weigh-in day, but I weighed myself again this morning because today is when we are supposed to weigh-in for my challenge. My weigh-in yesterday put me at 294.4, I'm retaining water, majorly. This morning when I weighed-in I was down to 293.8, so better than yesterday. I'm not too worried about this "gain" though, I logged it and I'm moving forward.

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 291.6 lbs

Current Weight: 293.8 lbs

Weight Lost: 21.2 lbs

Today I want to talk about something that I'm living through right now, my weigh-in this week brought this point up for me. The scale can be very misleading and it is not everything! This week it told me that I gained between 2 and 3 pounds this week, which I know is not true. I ate at or under my calorie goal at least 5 of 7 days this past week and began working out a bit harder, including strength training. Not to mention that I didn't eat an extra 7000-10,500 calories. My muscles are retaining the water they need to help recuperate from my toning sessions. Yesterday, I could have easily gotten discouraged and made unhealthy food choices, but I didn't. I know how I feel and I feel great! I know that the weight I "gained" this week will come off, in fact, .6 pounds came off since yesterday. This is just a part of the journey. Sometimes water retention happens or anything else, but we can't get discouraged. 

It's Monday, which means it's upper body toning today. I'm psyched for it and I'm sure my arms and shoulders are going to kill tomorrow, but I love having sore muscles in that sense. Do any of you love having those sore muscles too? In my opinion, having sore muscles for a few days is definitely worth it when I'll be getting a smaller and healthier body. 

Well, it's time to finish my breakfast and then get going on my workout. I've got a busy day ahead, I have a lot to get done this week. I hope that you all have a wonderful day. Until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In and Loneliness

Hi all!

Happy Sunday! How are you all doing today? Sorry I have been so quiet the past few days, I have taken a turn for the worse in regards to my sickness. I've been having horrendous sinus headaches and no matter what I do, they are continually getting worse. If it continues, I'll be heading in to the doctor soon. It's sort of a dreary day here as well, so how I'm feeling is correlating with the weather. We have snow on the ground (ugh!) and it's been cloudy. Tomorrow it's suppose to cool down a great deal too, so I'm not looking forward to that. 

Although I just had a weigh-in on Thursday, Sunday is my official weigh-in day, so I weighed myself anyway. I wasn't really expecting much, since I had just weighed in 3 days earlier and I had an off day nutritionally on Friday. Yesterday I didn't eat a whole lot, which probably has contributed to my weight loss. This sickness is really messing with my appetite. I'm having to force myself to eat most of the time, it's a hassle. Anyways, I lost .8 pounds since Thursday. 

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 292.4 lbs

Current Weight: 291.6 lbs

Weight Lost: 23.4 lbs

I'll admit that I am having a really hard time emotionally lately. Honestly, I'm feeling really lonely. I'm really missing interacting with people, but especially my friends. I can't wait to start up my class tomorrow, finally I'll have some interaction with more people again. I'm trying my hardest to keep a positive attitude and not let myself drown in these feelings. Hopefully these feelings will pass soon and I'll be my happy self again.

I'm cutting this post pretty short, mostly because I'm feeling horrible and my head is pounding. I hope that you all have a wonderful evening. Until next time!

~Sara~

First Weigh-In of 2015

Hi all!

Happy Thursday and happy 2015! :) Did you all have a good new year's eve? Mine was incredibly boring, just as I imagined. Sat at home, talked to my best friend on the phone and did some reading. In other words, it was a pretty typical Wednesday night. :) Oh and I also watched something on TV that my favorite singer/actor participated in and it was spectacular. He helped sing a medley of Frank Sinatra songs, it doesn't get much better than that! What did you all do to ring in the New Year? 

Last night I made some questionable food choices, not my smartest move, but it's alright. I stepped on the scale for my first weigh-in of the year (it's a weigh-in date for the challenge I'm participating in) and I was happy with my result. I lost .8 pounds since my last weigh-in and surpassed my goal for this weigh-in. In fact, I am already past my goal for the next weigh-in :) I could easily adjust my goals for the challenge, however, I sort of want to see where I'll be at the end of the challenge. So for now I'm leaving my goals where they are and hopefully I will continue this trend. I also took my measurements this morning and I have those recorded. I'm excited to see those numbers change as I add more strength training to my regimen. 

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 293.2 lbs

Current Weight: 292.4 lbs

Weight Lost: 22.6 lbs

I think I may try to starting walking again soon. I'm not completely over my sickness, not by a long shot, but it isn't getting any worse. Not to mention that I am anxious to start working out again, especially to try my new equipment. I also read in a medical journal that when you have a cold, light walking is actually good for you. So, either later today or tomorrow morning, I'll be starting to walk again. It'll be light but I may add my new ankle weights, just to test them out. :) 

This morning I was doing a great deal of thinking, mostly about my life in general. One of the major thoughts that kept reappearing was about how often times I give up what I want, in order to please someone else's wishes. Anyone who really knows me, knows that I am definitely a people pleaser. I am passive, so 99% of the time, I won't speak up if something is bothering me. This is definitely not a new development, I have been this way for as long as I remember. I don't voice my opinion or the things I need because I don't want it to cause a fight or argument. Believe me, I try to avoid those at all costs, even if it means giving something up. Why do I have to give up the things that I truly desire and need? Just because I am passive does not mean that I shouldn't stand up for myself. So, 2015 is going to be the year that I focus on myself and stand up for what I need. No more being pushed aside and being shoved to the back burner. I will put my needs first, physically and emotionally.  

Okay, well I'm off. I hope you all have a wonderful day. Until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In

Hi all!

How are you all on this beautiful Sunday morning? It's gorgeous here, a bit colder than it has been but the sun is shining today. On Tuesday and Wednesday, it is supposed to get quite cold here, so I'm not looking forward to that but I shouldn't have to go out in it, thankfully. 
Although it's a beautiful day, I am incredibly bummed. Yesterday, I got a full-on cold. It's been ridiculous, I'm feeling a bit better this morning after taking some medication for it but I'm still feeling pretty crappy. I really wanted to start using my new workout equipment yesterday already but I haven't been able to yet because I'm so congested that I'm having issues breathing while I'm just sitting here. Not being able to breath while working out would probably not be ideal, so I'm trying to focus more on my nutrition until I'm feeling better. Part of me really just wants to lay in bed and not do anything but I know that's not really an option. Laying in bed and not doing anything will just make me feel worse, so today I put on some actual clothes and am trying to keep a positive attitude. Hopefully this cold will pass quickly, so I can get back to my normal routine.

On a happier note, it is almost January! I'm really psyched for it because hopefully I'll get to visit my boyfriend soon. Right now, we're just waiting on his work schedule to come out and then we're going to book a flight. It'll be nice to get away for a weekend, not to mention that I miss him like crazy. My final semester of undergrad work begins on the 12th as well, let me tell you, I am really looking forward to it. This last semester is going to be incredibly busy, especially starting in the middle of February. Either way, I'm looking forward to starting classes again, I have definitely missed them. Going from having 3 classes to none, equals a very boring time. So, it'll be nice to get busier again. 

It's Sunday, so that means, weigh-in day is here. I'll be honest, I was not looking forward to my weigh-in because of the holiday and I wasn't counting calories or working out for a few days. However, I was pleasantly surprised when I stepped on the scale this morning. I saw a 2.6 pound loss, so I was quite happy. My next weigh-in for my challenge is on Thursday, and unless I gain almost 2 pounds in 4 days, I'll have met my goal. :) 

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 295.8 lbs

Current Weight: 293.2 lbs

Weight Lost: 21.8 lbs

How was everyone's holiday? I had a pretty good one. On Christmas Eve, I had a coffee date with my best friend and then went to church in the afternoon. Christmas day, my family got together with my mom's side and then we had a get together with my brother's family that evening. Finally, on Friday, I got together with my close friends and we had our little get together. We went out for lunch at our favorite place in my town and had some amazing conversation. Whenever my friends and I get together, it reminds me how much I miss them all. Most of us live in different states or cities. We're all spread out around Wisconsin, Illinois and Missouri, currently. This will only get worse when I move away, because I'll be the one who is the farthest away. My best friend and I were talking and the next time our entire group is together again, will probably be when one of us gets married, even then it is unknown. 

Well, a very important football game is coming on shortly, so I'm heading off. I hope that you all have a wonderful day. Until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In

Hi all!

Happy Sunday! How are you all doing today? It's a sort of dreary day here, it has been really cloudy the past few days. I do miss the sun, it always makes my days a bit better. Although it'll continue to be cloudy most of the week, it is going to warm up a bit over the next three days. However, it will get colder again by the end of the week. It's December in Wisconsin though, so what can I do? I keep look at the weather out by my boyfriend and the temperatures are making me insanely jealous! Their lows are higher than our highs. It's actually pretty cute, he tells me about how cold he is and it's 60 degrees. :) 

Seeing that it's Sunday, I'll start with my weekly weigh-in. I did my actual weigh-in on Friday this week because of the weight loss challenge I am a part of. Either way, I had a great weigh-in. I lost 1.4 pounds and was consistent with my fitness. I'll be honest, I was not perfect with my nutrition, not by far but it all worked out. In regards to the challenge, I exceeded my goal! :) It's probably a good thing too, with Christmas coming and all. 

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 297.2 lbs

Current Weight: 295.8 lbs

Weight Lost: 19.2 lbs

I cannot believe how quickly this month is going by, it's already the 21st! Christmas is in 4 days, so my nutrition won't be perfect this week either. I have already decided that on Thursday, I will splurge a bit and not worry about counting calories, however I will be watching myself the rest of the week. I may try to increase my fitness a bit to combat the extra calories. Otherwise, I'll just work hard the rest of the week. 

On a happy note, January is getting closer! :) I'm doing as much pre-planning as I can in regards to my trip, but it'll all come together. I cannot wait to go and visit my boyfriend. We had a great phone conversation yesterday afternoon that just made me miss him more than I already do. Ugh! It's going to be bittersweet to see him for only a weekend. Don't get me wrong, it'll be absolutely wonderful and I'll cherish those few days, however, I will miss him even more after the fact.

I'm going to cut this short. Time to continue watching the football game and my nieces and nephew will be over pretty soon. We're finally celebrating my dad's birthday at dinner tonight. I hope you all have a great day. So until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In

Hi all!

Happy Sunday! How are you all doing on this dreary Sunday morning? It has been ridiculously foggy here today and yesterday, but it has been in the upper 30s and lower 40s, so I can't really complain. If it was always like this in December, I would be much more prone to continue living here in Wisconsin. However, this is very strange for the middle of December, not to mention that there is still some snow on the ground. 

Yesterday marked one year since my grandmother passed away, I can't believe it's already been one year. Thankfully my dad and grandfather were both in good spirits yesterday. We miss her but we know that she's in a much better place now. 

Also, yesterday my mom and I went shopping for Christmas and I was able to pick out what I wanted. I definitely cannot wait for Christmas because I picked out all fitness related things: dumbbells, a kettle ball, resistance bands, ankle/wrist weights, and a medicine ball. I definitely cannot wait to start some resistance training again plus adding the ankle/wrist weights to my walks. I'm hoping that these small changes will help bring some large results.   

Alright, now time for my weekly weigh-in. My weight has been crazy this week because I went to the doctor on Friday morning and I wanted to compare my weight there to my scale at home. Today, I finally was able to make the comparison. According to my updated records, I have lost weight, so yay! :)

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 299.6 lbs

Current Weight: 297.2 lbs

Weight Lost: 17.8 lbs

I am so excited that it is this week because it is my dad and my boyfriend's birthday's on Friday! :) Sadly, I don't get to be with my boyfriend on his birthday but I am still really psyched about it. I get to celebrate two great men in my life, so how can that be a bad thing?!? I'll still try to make my boyfriend's day special, even from afar. 

Last night, I was told something that really hit me hard. I'm not going to go in-depth about what was said, however I will say this: I don't want my weight to define who I am. It made me think about my relationship. I think my boyfriend is a good looking guy and he says he finds me attractive. One thing that I really don't want is for people to look at us and seeing an attractive guy and a bigger girl, and wondering why we're together. I'll be honest, my boyfriend and I already have a social hurdle to jump over, so I don't want my weight to add another one. We have a 17 year age gap, he's 41 and I'm 24. He and I don't have an issue with our age difference, but many other people do. For us it works, I don't want any biological children and he already has 2 kids. I think it may be a bit different if I wanted kids of my own but I don't. I firmly believe that the heart wants what it wants. Our relationship is still in it's early stages but we do make each other happy and that's what is most important. 

So my question for all of you is, what do you think about having a large age difference in a relationship? Can it work out?

Well I'm off to go and have some lunch and watch the football game. I hope you all have a wonderful day. Until next time!

~Sara~

Weigh-In

Hi all! 

Happy Monday! How are you all doing today? It is another absolutely gorgeous day here! Today is the official start of my next school session, let the craziness begin. Thankfully I have gotten some work done this past weekend, so I have a bit of a head start. 

My nutrition has been majorly off the past few days, the stress had gotten a hold of me. I weighed-in today (I forgot to yesterday morning) and I am honestly surprised that I only gained a small amount. Either way, I'll take the small gain and I am moving forward. Last week I did not weigh-in because of various circumstances, so my gain seems a bit larger but I only gained .4 lbs from last week. 

Starting Weight: 315 lbs

Last Weight: 291.4 lbs

Current Weight: 293 lbs

Weight Lost: 22 lbs

I have to cut this pretty short because I have a lot to get done today. My goals for today, finish my journal for my capstone class. Then complete the other 2 discussions for this week and if possible write up one of the two journal outlines that I have left for this week. I am really hoping to get everything done early this week, so I can get a head start on next weeks work or begin researching for my finals. I hope that you all have a wonderful day. Until next time!

~Sara~