Losing Weight is Hard

Hi, all!

So, my fitness evaluation needed to be rescheduled for Tuesday. I know it is only a few days away, but I am a little bummed out that I was not able to find out my results. Oh well, that means I have a few more days to work hard. And let me tell you, I have been working incredibly hard. According to my scale at home, I have lost 12.2 pounds in a month. We'll have to see what the scale at the gym says on Tuesday. Either way, I know that I have made progress because I stuck to my nutritional goals 22 out of 32 days. I am sort of ashamed that in March I had 10 days where I either did not count calories, binged, or just went over. Even though I am ashamed of that, it also shows just how hard I worked the other days out of the month. Consistently I saw my weight dropping, that is a fact because on March 7th, I weighed in at 330 pounds and this morning the scale told me 317.8. The results are real.

Losing weight it hard, I will not deny that at all. If it were just an easy thing to do, I would not have topped the scale at 330 pounds, and I would have been able to keep off the 50 pounds I lost before. It is hard, plain and simple. There are days where I do not want to eat healthily, where I would rather just binge on all of my comfort foods. Or have a big bowl of pasta, a whole bag of chips, a huge bowl of ice cream. Or just a bunch of unhealthy but delicious foods from a fast food restaurant. There is nothing wrong with having pasta, chips, ice cream or fast food. Moderation is the key. To be honest, though, there have been days where I have said, 'Screw it,' I'm going to make a big plate of nachos or eat a big bowl of ice cream. Not to mention that some days I do not want to work out and sometimes I don't. This week I worked out all seven days because I wanted to. But other weeks I only work out 4 or 5 times, sometimes less than that because I just don't have the energy for it. The point is, I'm not perfect 100 percentage of the time. It just so happens that this was an excellent week for me. I ate 3,921 calories under my weekly goal. I worked out for a total of 299 minutes. And had a total calorie burn between food and exercise of 9619. If you don't know, that is 2.75 pounds for the week. Some days in March I did not do well at all, but I still was down 6.2 lbs.

Here's what I want you to get from this long drabble, you don't always have to be perfect! Some days will be bad and some good. Some weeks you will lose 2 pounds, and somewhere you will gain them back. Have more good days than bad. Eat all the foods you love in moderation or find healthier replacements that you love even more. Just stick with it, and the results will come. Slow and steady wins the race.

It is finally the weekend. I am still trying to get used to working again. My job may not be all day at this point but I am still trying to get used to being busier. It will get better when I am in my actual work schedule and not my training schedule. This varying schedule is weird but I will be into my actual schedule within the next few weeks. It will be nice to get my first paycheck on Friday though. My next one will be even better though, so I am excited about May 1st.  

Honest Tracking

Hi, all!

Happy Tuesday! How are you all doing on this cloudy and rainy day? I hope that you all had an enjoyable Memorial Day and remembered those who have sacrificed their lives for us. Have you set your goals yet? Since it was Memorial Day yesterday and some of my family had off work, my weekly schedule is a little out of whack. It seems like it should be Monday today but hopefully I'll get things figured out soon.

I'll be honest, I didn't do as well as I had hoped during dinner last night. I hate having to admit my faults like this but if I'm not honest with myself, then I won't make any changes. So, I logged everything I ate and thankfully I was only a couple hundred calories over. I would have been fine, but I decided to have a glass of soda, which put me a few hundred calories over my goal. Soda is one of those things that I rarely drink and I only like one kind, but of course, my dad had to go and buy a gallon of it the other night. Thankfully it's gone now and I don't have the temptation to drink it. Today is a new day and I'm ready to get back on track.

Today has been a pretty simple day, I worked out and as soon as I'm done with this post, I'm going to work on a few essays for some scholarships. It would be extremely helpful if I was able to win one of these scholarhips. So, I figure that I should apply for the ones that I'm able to, especially since I had some free time today.

Tomorrow I have orientation for my new job! I'm excited and a bit nervous to start, but I'm ready to be a little busier again. Plus, it'll be nice to have some money coming in, so I can pay off some bills and save for the future. I can't wait to see what this job has in store for me. So tomorrow will be a bit busier, but my morning routine will stay the same. I can't wait to share how it went.

Well, I'm off. Time to go and work my the scholarship essays. I hope that you all have a wonderful afternoon and evening. Until next time!

~Sara~

Short Update

Hi all!

How are you all doing today? Things have been a bit stressful here but I'm getting by. I have been struggling with evening snacking the past few nights, but today is a new day. Plus I have been having some migraines, so that has been affecting my schoolwork a bit. I am trying really hard to work through all these stressful situations and not over eat too much. It is one day at a time and thankfully I have been keeping up with my fitness.

This post is going to be ridiculously short today because I need to finish the outline for my paper and write it, then get started on my final. The rest of this week and next week are going to be crazy busy, so I'm working hard to not get overly stressed. But I just wanted to check-in. I hope that you all have a wonderful day! Until next time!

~Sara~

Emotional

Hi all!

How are you all today? It has been snowing on and off all day and it's quite upsetting. I really dislike the stupid accursed white stuff falling from the sky, winter can be over any time now. Time for some honesty.

How ironic is it that after posting my 'no excuses' blog post, I have been having a really tough time. It's been a trying day and a half, emotionally speaking. And you know what, I've been making excuses, I'll admit it. Last night and then this afternoon/evening I've been eating way too much, it's been emotional eating. Honestly, I don't know what I'm so emotional about and that's the worst part about it. If I can pinpoint what is causing my emotions to be like this, I could easily fix it but I can't. :( It's really frustrating actually because I want to eat well, I was eating well today (up until this afternoon), but then I just feel like eating everything in sight.

On Thursday, I'm having my first appointment with a Christian counselor. Typically I wouldn't share this information but I really want you all to know about my life. I really think that she'll be able to help a lot with my memory and hopefully we can work through why I am feeling the need to eat emotionally. For those of you who don't know this, I have been struggling with my memory since my car accident back in 2008 and it has only been getting worse.

Right now I am just trying to take things one moment at a time. This isn't ideal but it's all I can do right now and then hope for the best. Tomorrow I'm going to try my hardest to stay within my calorie range and also get some exercise in. I hope your evening is a great one. So until next time!

~Sara~

Routines

Hey all!

Happy Wednesday! How are you all doing today? It's "warming" up a little today, we have a high of 3 today. Finally tomorrow we have a high of 19 and it should be in the mid-30's by Friday. :) It's pretty sad that most of WI is really excited about that, but it's the truth. How is the weather by all of you?

Confession time... Last night was horrible, nutritionally. I was doing wonderfully during the day and I still had about 400 calories left after dinner. I was a bit hungry at around 8 pm, so I had some cheese and crackers and was at my calorie goal. My emotions got a hold of me around 9 and I was craving ice cream and of course I didn't just dish up a small amount in a bowl, instead I ate probably 1800 calories worth of it. :( I'm so incredibly disappointed in myself for it.

After yesterday, my ultimate goal today is to keep my emotions under control. So far, so good. Evening time is usually the hardest for me and I'm trying to understand why. Maybe I should eat more often throughout the day to help keep myself satisfied. I'm also trying to up my protein and fruits/vegetables. In addition to that, I'm trying to drink as much water as I can, especially today in order to detox my system from all the crap I ate last night. Things need to change, I cannot stay on this cycle. And honestly, I don't want to be one of those people who loses weight, then gains weight and loses again. I have to break the cycle, I need to lose this weight and keep it off. It's quite frustrating actually, I know that I can lose it. Before this weight gain, I had lost about 65 pounds and I know that once I get into my routine again, I will get back down to that weight and ultimately my goal weight.

I'm going to try and get a workout in after I'm done with this most, while I'm watching a movie. And then tomorrow I will wake up early enough to get a workout in before I have to baby sit my nieces. Exercise needs to be included in my days again. I remember how I always felt after my workouts and it's an amazing feeling. All around it just makes me happier, helps me sleep, and an array of other things. So I'm getting back at it and it will help assist my weight loss goals.

So time to end this post and get some light exercise in, just planning on walking/jogging but it's better than nothing. Tomorrow should be a bit more. Time to get back into a routine! I hope you all have a wonderful day. So until next time!

~Sara~

Quick Update and Confession (Day 666)

Hi all!

Happy Friday! How are you all today? This is going to be a really short post but I just wanted to check in and see how you all are doing. I've had an extremely busy day... worked out this morning, Skyped with Abid for a little bit, finished 1 of my finals, had to go to the library to print something out, had an interview, and a little more homework once I got home and 2 long conversations, one with my best friend and one with my mother. Even though I should have been working on my homework, it was nice to talk with them.

Today was a bad eating day for me though... I went way over my calories (700 calories over) because of stupid Panera Bread (where my interview was held) and I made a bad choice when I wanted something sweet. It is what it is. And I calculated it all out and as long as I stick to my goal tomorrow, I will still be 2000 calories under maintenance level. So that is encouraging and I'm going to do a kickboxing workout which will burn major calories and no eating back my exercise calories tomorrow. It'll all work out and I won't let one night of bad eating ruin the entire week.

Anyways... I have a lot of reading to do for my final, hopefully I'll finish the first one tonight before I head to bed. Tomorrow's goal, finish all of my reading for the final and write most if not all of the final. It'll be a challenge, but it needs to be done by Sunday. Time to get back to homework before I head to bed. I hope you all had a wonderful day and are having a great evening. So until next time!

~Sara~

Year 1 Day 156 (Day 521)

Hi all!

Happy Sunday! How is everyone doing today? It is an absolutely gorgeous day today, sunny with a high of 35. Sorry I wasn't able to post yesterday, I was crazy busy all day. We had to leave earlier than usual in the morning because my mom had a dentist appointment at 9:30, so we were out the door by 9 and we didn't get back until close to 4:30 and then we had to head off to church. After church I did have some time to relax but I needed to work on some schoolwork. I'll be honest, I made some unhealthy choices in the afternoon and I would have been fine if I wouldn't have kept on snacking at night. Not a great way to end my week, but it is what it is. I can't change it.

It's a new day and a new week and it's weigh-in day. I gained .6 pounds, and looking at all the factors, that's a major win. For all of your sake, I won't go into all of those factors because a few would be major TMI, but there are factor's working against me. But one thing I do need to work on this week is my nutrition  I did okay with it last week, but I could have made a lot better choices sometimes, and my snacking needs to improve. If I do feel the need to snack, I need to make healthier choices. This week, my main goal is to only snack on healthier items (fruits, veggies, peanut butter, ect...)

I want to be honest with everyone and share something that I've really been thinking about. I've really realized that I have such a hard time with my snacking, and something needs to change. So I've been looking into an over eaters group or something like that to see if it would help me. And there is one about 25 minutes from where I live but my car is not suppose to be driven on the high way, so there goes that idea for now. But I really think that it would be help, just to be able to talk to other people who understand how I'm feeling. My mom understands what I'm feeling to an extent but yet she still buys all of these foods that I'm trying to stay away from, so it's difficult. I don't think she understands my struggles completely but it is what it is.

I do have to say, I am loving my class a freakish amount! It's a small class, only 7 of us, plus our professor. Honestly, I love having small classes like this, because then we can really get to know one another better. But oh boy, I have a lot to get done this week. I need to finish up my reading that I didn't finish last week (oops) only 20 pages left of that though. And then 63 pages in another book for this week. Plus finishing up my paper that's due next Sunday. Thankfully I already finished my initial discussion posting for this week, so that's one less thing to worry about.

Today I found just another reason why I love my digital food scale so much. I made myself an afternoon snack, whole grain waffles with mixed berries, powdered sugar and cinnamon (delicious and only 271 calories!). So I grab my food scale to measure my mixed berries, a serving size is 1 cup or 140 grams (according to the nutrition label). I go ahead and set my measuring cup on my scale (saw how much it weighed and will at 140 grams to that number) and I hit the 140 gram total and it's not 1 total cup. Honestly, it was closer to 3/4 cup. Just goes to show you, measuring your food is the may to go. If I wouldn't have measured my berries, the calories that I ate would be altered a little (and yes, they are just berries so the calories wouldn't be a freakish amount off, but still). If I wasn't sold on measuring food completely before, I am now! :)

Since it's Sunday, we are having my brother, SIL and nieces and nephew over for dinner tonight. As many of you know, this is where I struggle a lot (because of all the dang food my mother makes). But I refuse to overeat tonight. Do you hear that body and mind, I will NOT overeat tonight. I am getting way too close to that stupid number that I never want to see again, and I won't EVER see it again.

But I really should get back to my homework. So until next time.

~Sara~